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Tonnage 2004

There’s nothing wrong with free games (with the proviso that a review is posted, of course). Getting them shipped right to my desk is also nice but this year for whatever reason I’m feeling the pinch and with November fast approaching I get a headache when I think about getting reviews organized. In the next few weeks we’ll see the release of Halo 2, Metroid Prime 2, and Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas. All highly anticipated games and all on different platforms. To fill in the PC contingent, it was announced recently that Half-Life 2 has gone gold and will ship in November.

This quarter should become known as Tonnage 2004 and I hope some statistician tracks the lost hours of work productivity so we can all see just how devastating this Quarter turns out.

I keep asking myself if it will even be possible to review games in a timely manner this year. I still have Paper Mario 2, F-Zero GX, Kingdom Under Fire: The Crusaders, NHL 2005 (GC), Mario Pinball Land and Myst IV to get through and still the games come. If I could play each game for 10 or 20 minutes it might not be a problem, but how would a review of Paper Mario 2 sound after 10 minutes of play?

“It’s like Paper Mario 64 but on GameCube.”

No, hours and hours of play are required for each title so at least a semblance of a review can be presented.

The inevitable has happened: things are being neglected as tough choices have to be made. Should I update the site or try to squeeze in a few hours of this game? Do I request Q&As even though I know I don’t have time to think of questions? Should I try to add some news items knowing that most are run-of-the-mill gone gold and shipped announcements? What order do I review the games in? Should I play it to the bitter end then pen the review? These are all questions that swirl into my thoughts after all my regular day-to-day living issues are taken care of. You know, family, going to work, eating, trying to keep the house clean, walking the dog, getting out of the house, washing clothes, ironing, getting to the grocery store – things that an increasing number of gamers are facing as they get older and parents finally kick them out of the house.

Do I have time to play games anymore?

That’s the question it ultimately comes to.

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Tonnage 2004 just might be my personal breaking point. Right now I’m thinking we’ll kindly accept the review copies that are sent then email the PR rep thanking them and indicating the review will be posted sometime in March 2005. Pushing back a release date should be familiar to anyone that follows the industry. “Sorry, the writer working on the review has gone temporarily blind for three months. Though the release date has been pushed back you can expect it to be the best damn review ever, in the history of gaming journalism!”

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But with most websites, traffic is the key to generating cash. If the Armchair Empire posted a review of Half-Life 2 tomorrow, the traffic would likely be astronomical. Post it four or five months from its release and the traffic might blip a little but it would remain fairly average. This fact “encourages” quick reviews so traffic can be upped and the resulting (meager) cash folded back into the site to keep the server bill paid. This forces my hand somewhat – review game X then move on. Don’t allow enjoyment to creep into it. Doing so might jeopardize the speed at which reviews can be churned out. It’s the gaming equivalent of a one-night stand – no long term relationships for me!

I’ll admit it’s a unique situation to be in. If I were paying for every game my library of games would look very different than it does today and I would play at my leisure. And if I was reviewing games full-time and making a living doing so I’d certainly be less whiny about Tonnage 2004. It’s just too much too fast!

If I ever see another Tonnage 2004, I swear I’ll just pack it in. I’ll sell my share in the Armchair Empire and move on. Maybe I’ll buy and play to completion five or six games a year. Or if another Tonnage 2004 comes along I’ll vengefully hand out the lowest scores you’ve ever seen, picking each game apart in a diabolic fashion. Ambiguous “market forces” be damned, I never want to see this many high-profile (or otherwise) games released so close together in a single quarter. It sucks. And as the consumers of games, it’s up to us to mail each and every game publisher a calendar with October, November and December removed. (Mailing addresses can be found on the back of each game pack.) It would be a symbolic gesture (creating a tonnage of our own) and definitely make a collective statement of the general discontent among gamers.

Speak up people!

- Omni

omni@armchairempire.com

(October 24, 2004)


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