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End of Year Awards: 2002

End of Year Awards are always a bit fun to award, especially the decision making process which generally entails drinking heavily and eating too much cabbage. This year was no different. It was actually a pretty good year for gaming; PC games thundering along, GameCube and Xbox coming into their own, and Playstation 2 getting the job done. There were ups, there were downs, but there was always fun... okay, not always fun but you get the picture. Read on and see which game was awarded Best Crowd of the Year, Worst Excuse of Softcore Pornography Masquerading as a Videogame, and PC Game of the Year, among many others.

Best Game No One Heard Of: Victorious Boxers (PS2)

I was one of the fortunate gamers that got to play this game. Although it was quirky and eccentric, I still think it is the best boxing game on the market and probably the best-kept sports game secret (except maybe ISS: Pro Evolution to the casual gamer).

One of the Best Gaming Moments Missed in Real Life:

Inserting New York Mets catcher Mike Piazza as a pitcher and beaning New York Yankees catcher Roger Clemens in the head. I did so in High Heat, Triple Play, and All-Star Baseball. Piazza threw the hardest in Triple Play.

Award for Popping Out Add-Ons Faster than Gerbils Make Babies:

The Sims

How many add-ons are there? Are there add-ons for the add-ons?

Proof that Beating a Dead Horse Can Keep a Series Alive and Well:

The Sims

A quirky game that has blossomed into a nice little cash cow. Each subsequent expansion pack adds new things that really do make the game more fun.

Biggest Waste of Money for a Christmas Present for 2002:
Gameboy Advance
Boy, we recon there's going to be more than a few pissed off Christmas consumers wanting to give Nintendo a piece of their mind. A good number of GBAs surely flew off the shelves during the Christmas shopping season, and BAM!, early January comes along with Nintendo unveiling a newer, better portable system. That's cold! Makes us wonder why they didn't just wait and release this version of the GBA and do without the other, but that's a topic that will get a rant all to itself...

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Award for Funniest Moment at a Videogame Store:

Hearing one GameStop employee explain to a father and his eight-year old son that GTA: Vice City is not appropriate for his kid only to be told by the father that he was buying the game for himself. The employee looked like an ass, but he was really just doing his job.

Worst Excuse of Softcore Pornography Masquerading as a Videogame:

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BMX XXX

Are you kidding me? When are the Girls Gone Wild video games coming out? Will Snoop Dogg be in them?

The "If I See One More Game By..." I’m Going to Pull Out My Eyebrows Award: Mary Kate and Ashley games

If I have to suffer through seeing one more game on the shelf, I am gonna drop kick myself into a dumpster.

Xbox Live Game of the Year: MechAssault

This title alone is reason enough to get Xbox gamers to hook up to the Xbox Live online gaming service. What’s not to like? Huge 'Mechs with big weapons, great controls, massive destructible levels, and the Xbox Live headset that allows for smack talking after you whooped some 'Mech booty. Better yet Microsoft will be providing free new downloadable elements, such as new 'Mechs, levels, and game modes. This is the future of console gaming.

Wedgie-causing Character Costume: Storm’s, from X-Men: Next Dimension

Did her superheroine suit shrink at the cleaners? Has Magneto placed her under the control of some kind of evil Bad Fashion Sense ray? As good as her butt looks in that thongy costume, you just know Storm can’t be very comfortable flying around in it.

Best Licensed-based Xbox Game: Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Before these three license-based games, Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring, Bruce Lee: Quest for the Dragon, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer came out, how many of you honestly thought that Buffy the Vampire Slayer would not only be the best license-based game of the three, but also one of the best Xbox games of 2002 period? This title is a showcase for future developers on how to create a great license-based videogame.

Gaming News Story of the Year: (tie) Microsoft buys Rare / The Sims Go Online

Singling out a particular story is tough because so much has happened in the last year. E3 tends to release a glut of gaming information, not the least of which was the hype surrounding games like Doom III and Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker (which is not to be confused with “The Wind Maker” which Omni claims as his tagline). But the two stories mentioned above were selected because they hold real significance. The Sims will probably become the most played online game ever and take gaming from the fringe – yeah, it’s still on the fringe – and make it mainstream to the point of being an acceptable work-time activity. (Okay, maybe I exaggerate a little.) Microsoft snatching up Rare was big news for both GameCube and Xbox fans - the former feeling letdown and the latter feeling a level of triumph. Although it remains to be seen how the dust settles on this one, the outcome will be very interesting.

Best Description of Game Control: Omni’s review of Spider-Man (XB)

“Imagine you’ve just eaten five bowls of high-octane chili and washed the meal down with prune juice laced with a liquid laxative. The intestinal results are much like Spiderman’s camera – fast and loose.”

Coolest Videogame Collectible: Kimahri

From Omni’s review: “Truth is, I’m obsessed with this figure so providing any kind of objective perspective is impossible.”

Best Use of a Movie License: Spiderman: The Movie: The Game

Worst Use of a Movie License: Minority Report

Guilty Pleasure Award: Godzilla: Destroy All Monsters Melee (GC)

Omni has a stack of games to review, but most nights he can be found pummeling cities into rubble, cursing Mothra, and loving every minute of it.

The Disturbing But Vaguely Erotic Award: BloodRayne

Nothing is so disturbing as watching a female supermodel vampire latch onto a Nazi goon and begin to feed – moaning softly and slightly gyrating her hips.

Best Crowd of the Year: NHL Hitz 2003

Most sports games offer an arena full of one-dimensional cardboard cutouts. NHL Hitz 2003 might have smaller arenas, but they’re packed with fully 3D crowds and it added to the atmosphere immensely.

Best Story of the Year: The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind (PC, XB)

Nothing else really compares to Morrowind’s wide-open story structure. It’s like taking part in some kind of interactive fantasy novel complete with political intrigue, vampires, and enchanted items. Following the main story is almost impossible - so many side quests distract from it, that you can’t help but go off and get involved with some really weird characters. Plus, the story is somewhat affected by the player choices which means a high replay factor and a moderately different story.

Best Interview Quotable from the Armchair Empire: Bill Linn (Linn PR)

Responding to a comment about glitzy game launches, Bill said, “That’s all through the industry. Anybody that thinks they need stars at a party to get journalists jacked-off, that’s bullshit. That’s not what it’s all about. It’s all about the product. And if people try to make it more than what the product is about then they’re blowing smoke up people’s asses and they’re wasting money.”

The “I Wouldn’t Even Play That With Your Joystick” Award:

Hooters Road Trip

Runner-up: BMX XXX

Best Movie Based on a Videogame License: Resident Evil

Worst Movie Based on a Videogame License: Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within

(Note: If we could have figured out if Ecks Vs. Sever was a videogame turned into a movie or a movie turned into a videogame, it would have won one of these "Worst" awards. As it is, it probably deserved both of them.)

Peanut Butter and Jelly Award (For two games that go together perfectly): GTA: Vice City and Activision Anthology

After a hard day bust’n heads and jack’n rides, there’s nothing I like better than to settle down at the hotel with some smooth Atari 2600 action.

PC Game of the Year: Star Wars Jedi Knight II: Jedi Outcast

The perfect combination of lightsabre combat, first person shooter mayhem, and using the force to solve puzzles. Special moves with lightsabres? How could you not want to play it? Runners up: Grand Theft Auto 3, Warcraft 3.

(Mark) Games I Think I Could Have Won but that I Didn't Play Because I Need to Upgrade My PC:

The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind, Mafia, Neverwinter Nights.

Best Reason to Spend $500 on a Graphics Card: Doom 3

For the first time, it might actually be worth your while to shell out the dough now so that you can be ready for "future games" (i.e. Doom 3)

Biggest Disappointment: Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit 2

I hear the PS2 version is better, but that does me no good. With the potential to be great, EA delivers a solid but unsatisfactory game that could have been legendary.

Runner up: Unreal Tournament 2003

Tempting Reasons to Jump into the Console World: Virtua Fighter 4, Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance, Dead to Rights, Socom: US Navy Seals.

Best Returning Franchise: Hitman 2

Yes I'm horribly biased, as even if Hitman 2 was mediocre I would have found some award to give it. Luckily for me, it rocks.

Runner up: Soldier of Fortune 2, Aliens Vs. Predator 2, No One Lives Forever 2.


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