March! Offworld Recon

The problem is that after such a creative storyline, the game itself just can’t cut the mustard.  This bizarre piece of virtual Martian warfare clearly tried to ride on the crest of success wave of titles such as Goldeneye, Doom, Quake and Unreal.  This game is one of many to fail miserably, its almost as depressing as watching a baby bird fall to its death in an attempt to fly, but this baby bird deserved it!

The graphics are poor, even sketchy at best, and I have found that even 

on the best of PC’s this game fails to deliver.  Just as the game begins to heat up, the refresh rate worsens, and the levels literally pop up before you.  To be honest, it's appalling.  The enemies, although creative, lack life due to the slowness of the game and vary as much as Californian weather.  Similarly, the weapons were plain, unimaginative or completely non-existent on several levels where your only option is to collect more bullets for your frustratingly annoying gun.  Furthermore the soundtrack... Well what soundtrack there is is monotonous, boring and sounds as intriguing as a whirling fan.  If the game developers have refused point blank to make the game visually inviting, then the least they could do is play a funky little Madonna tune to keep us awake.

Just to add a little salt to those wounds, there is no real substance to the game at all.  There are no major objectives and nothing really to do other then finish the game, and even when you do finally complete a level, there’s no continuing storyline to keep you intrigued.  The special ingredient this game misses in its game play is motivation; there is not an ounce of that “can’t put it down” factor.  After a few levels all you find yourself doing is shooting the aliens, running to the exit, BAZAM! Next level… you get the picture!

March! Offworld Recon sets out with the best interests at heart; the storyline seems solid and maybe even curiously inviting, but in the fickle world of FPS, nothing can be certain (other than the bargain basement) – a fate to which March! Off-World Recon is destined.  My final thought?  If there was a Nobel peace prize for gaming… I really don’t think this one would get it.

- Chase Scott

(May 17, 2004)